My Life in Turkey: Act I

Meet the Players

Zavfish: The family’s private driver who picked me up from the airport at 1:00 am. He had a sign with my name on it. I know, right? I felt so important. He doesn’t speak a word of English and I don’t speak a word of Turkish, so it made for a pretty quiet hour-long ride home. I was, however, able to find out through various hand motions and affirmative and negative sounds that he is married with two children, ages 10 and 1. His eyes lit up when he was “talking” about his kids, which made me like him right off the bat. He reminds of a Turkish Sam-wise Gamgee—a little pudgy with a good heart.

Sidika: Zeynep’s mother, who was waiting for me at the door when I arrived at 2:00 am. She is a wonderful woman and I think we will be good friends. She is warm and very conscientious of me and my needs…I like her a lot. At the same time, she is a different kind of mother than what I’m used to. While it’s obvious she loves her daughter very much, she plays a very minimal role in her upbringing. More to come on that front.

Jem: The father who was sitting in the kitchen smoking a cigarette when I came in last night. Fortunately he doesn’t smoke inside very often and, I’m not sure how or why (I think it is the biggest tender mercy to me), but for some reason the house doesn’t smell like smoke…like, at all. I’m very grateful for that. He seems like a good man though who loves his kids a lot. I’m still not sure what he does, but it must be very lucrative…these people are SET UP.

Mary Jane: The 28-year-old Filipino nanny who has already become my bosom buddy, showing me the ropes and being very patient with me and my ignorance in this new household and culture. Okay, so before coming I thought that the nanny already here was the nanny/housekeeper who kind of did everything. No, no, no, no, noooooo… Enter Vera. And…Vera. The Vera’s are two middle-aged women from Moldovia who rotate as housekeeper here every 6 months. Yes, they’re both from Moldovia, and yes, they’re both named Vera. They’re both here right now because they’re switching soon. One stays here as housekeeper for 6 months, then goes home for 6 months while the other comes. Wow. That’s already a lot of money in plane tickets, not including their salaries. But after eating their cooking I completely understand why the Ustunberks keep bringing them back. Oh. Baby.

Ohssan: k, I’m not quite sure what the relation is, but he’s a 10-year-old kid here right now for 20 days. I think he might be Jem’s son from a previous marriage or something. Anyway, picture quintessentially chubby 10-year-old kid who doesn’t care to talk to you that much, but can’t resist any kind of fun like soccer or hide-and-seek. He’s becoming my little pal…I think he appreciates my affinity for being active.

Zeynep: Finally we arrive at the TRUE head of the household. This little 7-year-old has got the rest of the house eating out of the palm of her hand. She has every toy imaginable, along with every toy not imaginable (some quite creepy, actually…make I’ll try to sneak a photo later). Her room is perfectly coordinated and matching and she doesn’t lift a finger to keep it clean because other people do EVERYTHING for her. But you can’t blame her…no one asks her to do anything for herself, they just do it. She is VERY indulged and starts to “cry” when things go less than perfectly for her, which isn’t very often. Oh man, this isn’t fair to start off with this because, much to her credit, she is a very sweet and endearing girl. She isn’t super demanding and is happy to sit in her room coloring or watching TV by herself without having all the attention in the house. I really like her a lot…we have fun together.

Lilli and Lola: This list of characters would not be complete without mentioning the household pets. Lilli is the nicest tiny dog I’ve ever met. Usually tiny dogs are mean, but Lilli is a sweetheart. I hate to admit it, but I like her. Lola, on the other hand. She continues to add to my long list of why I hate cats. She’s actually pretty cool-looking…she’s a pure white Turkish Angora with one blue eye and one green eye. But she’s basically second-in-command in the house, after Zeynep. She bites or scratches anyone who comes near her (except alpha Zeynep, of course). I actually watched her draw blood from Mary Jane today. She’ll be lucky if she makes it my full stay without a….I’ll let you fill that in. Oh, and the family also has two hedgehogs which they allow to roam free in the backyard. I haven’t gotten to see them yet as they hibernate during the day, but I’m dying to lay my peepers on those little guys as I’ve never seen a real hedgehog and they look soooooooooo cute in pictures. I’ll keep you posted.

Well, that concludes our list of characters…for now. I’m sure there will be more to come.