Ketçap

Sometimes I look at the influence the U.S. has on the world and I believe all that “City Upon a Hill” stuff. Other times I shake my head sadly and cry myself to sleep because of our detrimental influence in some areas. One such example? Ketchup—the unnaturally red, slightly sweet but at the same time tangy, beacon product of American Food Processing. I’m in Turkey, right? Surrounded by sundry exotic, mouth-wateringly scrumptious delicacies and vitals. But what do you think is the sauce/topping of choice for the kids? Ketchup! What do you think they eat on their noodles? Ketchup! What do you think they eat on their rice? Ketchup! What do you think they eat on their toasted cheese sandwiches? KETCHUP! Okay, okay, so I know when I was like FOUR I went through a BRIEF phase of making my “secret recipe” that consisted of a slice of bread with mayonnaise sandwiched with a slice of bread with ketchup on it, but that didn’t last long...at least not after I realized there was actually a wonderful world of food out there. Goodbye Heinz. Hello Yoshida. Anyway, it makes me sad that we have permanently polluted Mediterranean cuisine. I think I'm going to cry myself to sleep tonight. After I write Al Gore.